The art of yours has it's imperfections, but the style is in general really neat. Just try to avoid the general manga/anime style, since that would kill your personal touch to the comic.
As for the monouloge in panel three: it came a little too fast. It would have been better if you let the readers see more of the protagonists daily life before jumping right to her background. And the mention of her parents would also have fit better later on, you may could've made a little scene out of it.
But remember, these are my personal options, and they don't need to be the best to listening to.
Carry on, making comics isn't the easiest thing to do, but it sure will make you grow as an artist.
And I also sorry for my grammar and mispellings....

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Shoplifters of the world, unite!

very nicely drawn. my only problem is grammar usage. unless that is how the character typically talks, proper grammar and spelling should be used. (look at me, talking like a teacher, lol)

i like it though, i'm going to keep reading

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"Cookies are the ultimate source of happiness. Next to Jack Sparrow of course."

in order to enhance readability the horizontal gaps should be at least two times thicker than the vertical. it really helps.
also tilted panels like you use them here should be reserved for scenes with some kind of action in it, since they look more dynamic. but the scene itself is pretty calm, so there is a contradiction.
it would have been also better to split the text in two boxes.
like ~sabakuu already said, the transfer between the panels is a bit too sudden.
especially the last one is confusing. why is she somewhere completely else of a sudden?
well, even though its not perfect i still kinda like your manga. just keep going~